So many miracles of manifestation, completion, and new beginnings have occurred since my last blog post. The stream of life flows so quickly that it takes a huge effort to stop, reflect, and consciously let go of what has passed. This week will mark the two year passing of my dear husband, James. It has been both an eternity and the blink of an eye. In many ways the wife, lover, and friend that I was to James no longer exists. Today I am the product of those two years of letting go and embracing the next chapter in the the Book of Lin.
That’s where the Noble No comes in. To get to the BIG yes, we must say no to anything else. Temptation tells us that we must settle. Perhaps that is a big lie. Perhaps, however, it might just be that sometimes we need to say yes to to something not quite perfect, so that the greater yes can appear.
For two years I have wanted to move. Rather than rush the process of grief, I lived with it. That included allowing myself to stay where I was until I found something better. I didn’t know exactly what that would be, I just knew I would recognize it when it occurred. I made a decision to allow the Spirit to bring my new home in the perfect time. In my mind’s eye, I saw the things that would be part of my new home. During the last two years I have looked at many spaces, none of them even remotely as wonderful as my current home.
The practice of the Noble No is a discipline that allows us to become attuned to the highest and best opportunity in any moment. The effort needed to be still and observe the impact of a yes or no on our body, mind, or spirit opens doors to new vistas. This is exactly what happened, in the most wild and wonderful way, when I said yes to a new beginning.
Just three weeks ago I had a strong urge to walk to the post office. It made no sense, but the urge was strong and I heeded it. That was my original yes. To my surprise a vacancy sign hung on an apartment building I had admired for several years. I said yes when I made the initial call to see the vacant apartment. It was almost perfect, except that the view outside the windows was downright ugly! I gave a tentative yes, focusing on what I liked about the apartment, and chose to override my visceral response to the ugly view. The building manager said no to my offer to write a check to hold the space. That was his mistake and my blessing.
I sat with the decision for a week and submitted an application. Days went by. Each time I wanted to call my intuition told me to “let it be.” I prayed, “If not this, then something better. Please lead me.” Shortly after, I had a deeper recognition that beauty was important to me, hence my revulsion with regard to the view. Yet, in spite of that I was willing to move, since this apartment had almost everything I wanted. Some part of me was willing to settle, but a greater part knew that it wasn’t the perfect fit. Yet in the midst of this uncertainty, I was still called to say yes to the apartment. I was so confident that I was moving that I called the movers and gave notice to my apartment’s management company. Not logical, but a decision that came from the deepest part of my being. I knew it was the right thing to do.
Finally, I knew it was time to call the building manager at the new apartment. He did not return my calls promptly. When he did, he said that he “forgot” to turn in the application, then he made a mistake and it was declined and resubmitted it. There were lots of signs that this was way too complicated. Something was off, and it felt like there was another space. I just didn’t know where to find it! I called an intuitive friend who commented, “I think that you are going to be upgraded to more beauty. There is no need to search for it. It is a gift and it will appear shortly.”
The very next morning a dear friend presented me with an advertisement for a brand new apartment building. It had everything I wanted, including amazing views from every window. The totally unexpected apartment in an unexpected location had everything I had written down as part of my original ideal scene. We went together, I submitted an application, and two hours later I was approved. My new home is six blocks from the beach and I’m surrounded by nature. The view is sublime.
So why then, did I have to say yes to something that was not 100%? In my willingness to say yes to the first apartment, I gave myself permission to stretch my comfort zone in many ways. I was in a neighborhood I knew, just six blocks from my current apartment, with friends nearby. By the time I saw what I really wanted, I was able to say yes to a new neighborhood. The intermediate and tentative yes to change was replaced by a resounding YES!
The sweetest thing of all is that I signed the lease for this apartment on the day of my 10th wedding anniversary. I get the keys to my new apartment on the two year anniversary of my husband’s passing. The probability of this unfolding of events, and the timing surrounding them, is something that my angel in heaven would have orchestrated! He had a sense of humor in life, and I expect that it exists beyond the grave.
In either event, it is a full circle that allows me the grace to say No to what was, and yes to what is to be.
The Noble No is a wonderful container. Pay attention, for it holds the space for your big Yes to manifest.
Let us all live long, say yes, and prosper. In the words of my husband’s favorite song, “The best is yet to be.”
How has your no led to a bigger yes? I’d love to hear from you.
A View of the Beach
